Bada-bing: A Joisey Boyee Theatrical Event

Friday night I saw Jersey Boys on Broadway. I was out with a friend trying to find some last minute rush tickets to a show, and this was the best we could do. I heard some surprisingly non-hate filled buzz about this jukebox musical chronicling the careers of Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons, so thought it could be fun-ish.

I'll admit right up front, I'm not the audience for these cookie-cutter pre-packaged musicals that present overly-familiar pop songs sung by overly-untalented performers. Jersey Boys is only slightly less formulaic in that there are a few on stage who actually deserve to be there.

The show is a very VH1 Behind the Music type story of how four guys from Jersey got together to make some really great music. There wasn't too much scandal or drama. A marriage falls apart because of frequent touring. One member has a gambling problem that leads way too much stage time given to bad New York actors with bad New York accents parading around as gangsters. The story lacks much of a dramatic punch and everything about the writing screams "here's this dialogue, now give me my paycheck." There were some heartfelt monologues at the end of the second act that would have been touching had anything of equal substance appeared before intermission.

The guy playing Frankie Valli though does a near-perfect impression of the singers unique vocal talents, but never falls into the parody trap. He creates his own character, one of only two that appear on stage all night. This guy may actually go places. Hell, even Linda Lavin was in It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's Superman: The Musical. Every star has at least one item on their resume they'll have to deny one day.

The true theatrical experience for me that night was more of a meta-theater event, with the audience entertaining me more than the show. Sitting in the back of the orchestra section, I had perfect view of most of the crowd and about 20 minutes into the performance I realized just about every seat was filled with a housewife from Hackensack. My first clue that I was surrounded by Jerseyians came when a women turned around and asked us to stop vibrating. We told her that was not me, but the vibrations from something we in the city call a subway. A few moments later, an actor said a line something akin to "Heeey, oooh, Bada-bing, ya know what I'm sayin? Johnny from Belleville ovah here!" At the mention of a Jersey placename, half the crowd went wild. "Yah Belleville! Wooo!" as if it was a personal shout-out at a rock concert. Lines like "Heeey, Ooooh, Bada-bing. We settle this with a handshake- it's called a Jersey contract," elicited explosive applause from the audience who shouted things right back like "Yah, Jersey-style baby!" I couldn't tell which was worse: the writing that insisted on starting every other line with "heeey, oooh, bada-bing" or the crowd thinking that was real-life in Jersey.

To top off the experience, someone noticed during the intermission that James Gandolfini was in the audience. I have never seen such hysteria so close up before. Everyone in the house started screaming things like "oh my Gawd, it's Tony Soprano!" and "this is amazing, I love The Soprano's" to no one in particular. I don't think any of them knew the man's real name. It took 2 house managers and ushers to subdue people back into their seats to start the second act.

As true blue Jersey boy, I felt the entire theater from audience to stage was filled with one cliche after another. I was embarrassed for these people. They must have thought Jersey Boys was the cultural event of the year for them. These are the kinds of people who will insist that Wicked changed their lives. After the show we ran out of there as fast as possible, while the rest of the crowd, I assume, piled onto a bus to take them all back to Paterson, New Jersey.

Woooo! Paterson in the house! Bada-boom!