Deutschlands, deutschlands, uberalles....

Updated: Click here for Day Two, Day Three, Day Four, and Day Five.

Last week I went vacationing in Germany to visit my best friend Sharyn. She has been living in Frieburg, Germany for the last year and it was high time I get to see her again. You can catch up with her wacky adventures at her blog, Swithy in Ausland. It's the most entertaining blog this side of The Matt-Cave (though she could stand to mention our week long adventures a bit more than one stinkin' paragraph). Oh well, I guess I'll have to go on endlessly about the trip for both of us. What follows is a detailed story of my time in Germany. But don't worry, kids. This book's got pictures.

America















I'm about to depart for Germany. Diran is upset to see me leave. Freakishly upset. She calls me on my cell while I am at the airport. We talk about the London bombings that happened that morning. "So try not to die, Maffy," she says. Thanks, Diane.

Sharyn's Apartment



















After 10 hours of travel I arrive in Germany. Sharyn is waiting to greet me. She looks creepily amused to see me. Like Dakota Fanning-creepy.

Freiburg



















Sharyn shows me around Freiburg, a small city where she is one of 10 people between 20 and 28. Not boring at all! Here Sharyn poses in front on the Munsterplatz, a cobblestoned city-center that often houses street markets and fairs.

Freiburg



















Here I am on the Munsterplatz in front of a German-looking building. I like posing in Germany.

Freiburg



















There are small canals running throuhout the city, like the one pictured on the left at my feet. Legend has it, if you step in one you have to marry a Freiburger. Suffice it to say I stayed far, far away from those things. Except in this alley. Germany is filled with little alleyways like this. Alleys get me excited because they are so cute. Don't I look like the German Mary Tyler Moore?

Weiner Cafe















Sightseeing makes me thirsty. Luckily there is no shortage of refreshment at Weiner Cafe. I like pretty German cocktails. And I'll tell you so. Before swallowing your face.

Weiner Cafe















I also like pretty German Sharyn. Notice that I am wearing my watch in this picture. I seemed to have lost that watch in Germany at some point. It was the coolest thing I've ever owned and was given to me by someone very special, so it kills me to think it might be lost. But this is the last picture in which it appears. Sharyn, it has GOT to be at that cafe! Find it for me!

Weiner Cafe















When I get drunk, I can't help but vouge. And these Mai-Tai's pack an aggressive punch, much like the Germans themselves. Strike a pose!

Sharyn's Apartment















Sharyn is pooped from our first day of fun. She sleeps on a matress on her floor in her tiny room with no decorations and no furniture. For dinner parties she makes her guests sit on suitcases. Ghetto Fab!