Or maybe I'm just part werewolf...

Germans have the uncanny ability to express concepts and ideas that the English language sorely lacks. We all have our favorites. Schadenfreude, glee at another's misfortune, is popular. The urge to go for long walks or to travel can easily be summed up with Wanderlust. Fahrvergnügen is simply the pleasure of driving, though not a very pretty word. I could go on. Yesterday I found another word that summed up so much of what I think a lot of us feel these days.

Weltschmerz.

Weltschmerz is the depression and pain caused when you compare what the world is to what you think the world should be. The ideal versus the actual. The possible versus the reality. It's such a profound, yet simple thought. A romantic pessimism, if such a thing exists.

I suspect it's the reason wolves howl at the moon. They are wolves and can not change it, but oh if they could! Perhaps a monkey or a fish would suit them best, but alas it is not to be. Instead they let out a bloodcurdling moan. I can relate.

A few years ago, I went to London with my best friend to visit friends who were studying abroad. We slept on the most uncomfortable cushions on their living room floor but after spending days traveling and touristing about, one could hardly notice. I remember one night I had a strangely vivid dream whose premise could easily be likened to a Bronte novel. Something to do with the loss of love and the crushing defeat of reality. It was hazy at best, but there was a dark damp castle and some sort of trumpet involved. The trumpet's call was supposed to release all the pain and angst and sadness forced into whoever blew the horn by the world. It makes no sense but it was a dream. So Dreaming Matt snuck up into the tower and pulled back the tapestry (all old castles have magical artifacts behind their old tapestries), and blew the horn. At the same time Real Life Matt exploded in some eerie unconscious moan that woke up everyone in the house. Luckily my best friend leapt on me and forced me awake and calmed me down. I laid awake the rest of the night shaking from the fright. I didn't have a name for the feeling my unconscious mind forced out of me that night. I now know it was weltschmerz. Thank you, Germany. Gesundheit.