How many times can I mention how unattractive she is in this post...

Could Ashlee have been lying to us all this time?

Watching Saturday Night Live this past weekend with musical guest Ashlee Simpson, my boyfriend and I speculated on how talented she is in relation to her older sister, Jessica. We determined that while we couldn't think of a single song that Jessica sang (we are very old and out of touch, it would seem), Ashlee seemed more talented, if much less pretty. That was our professional bitchy-gay opinion during her first performance of the night, Pieces of Me. When she came on for her second performance, Ashlee's voice started singing Pieces of Me over the loudspeaker, while the band started playing a different song, and the real Ashlee looked terrified and confused and started hopping around looking like an idiot before slinking off-stage. NBC quickly cut to a commercial while her singer-less band continued to play.

Being a moron, I didn't realize what happened. At the very end of the show, she appeared with guest host Jude Law (and got to actually hug him lots! SWOON!) to lie to the public.

From the AP story:

"What can I say?" guest host Jude Law said with Simpson standing next to him at the end of the show. "Live TV."

"Exactly," Simpson said. "I feel so bad. My band started playing the wrong song. I didn't know what to do so I thought I'd do a hoe-down."

Her record company, Geffen Records, said there was a computer glitch. Instead of some pretaped electronic percussion, the recording of "Pieces of Me" started mistakenly performing, the record company said in a statement.

Sorry, Ashlee but the track that played your fake voice wasn't a recording of your song. It was a voice track to fake your singing!

I feel like we need to ask an important question. Why is SNL assisting artists in their lies by allowing them to lip-synch on their stages? They are supposed to be a performance venue, if albeit an irrelevant one. They should at least require their crappy guests to perform. God knows she isn't getting paid for her looks.

I feel so betrayed. How can the ugly sister of one of America's favorite Newlyweds treat us this way? And that "oops, sorry everyone, I may be a liar, but I'm such a darn cute one" shtick may have worked for you during our much beloved MTV reality show, The Ashlee Simpson Show, but back then you were only a passing fad who could sing. Now we know the truth. And it isn't pretty!